Not TMI at all. One of the things I've heard but need to research more is that our levels of sexual desire change throughout life and that sexual desire, sometimes referred to as sexual attraction, is a spectrum much like orientation and gender. So you have those who are sexual and remain so, are not sexual and remain so, and those whose levels of sexual attraction fluctuate a bit or who find that they feel sexual attraction only if they have a deeper connection (this is sometimes referred to as demisexual or gray sexual).
It was only during my first year at law school, which was also my first year on dreamwidth, that I came across asexuality as an identity. Prior to that I had thought that I was "broken" in some fashion, or that I'd been celibate for so long that I was just used to it. When I found out I had Lyme, a disease that apparently attacks libido in addition to so many other things, I wondered if my lack of sexual drive was due to that. I've determined that it is okay either way. I can rarely recall ever feeling sexual attraction or the need for sex (speaking of TMI), and it usually required some deeper connection those few times I did feel it.
There are also quite a few misunderstandings about asexuality. I highly recomment The Asexuality Visibility and Education Network (AVEN) as a place to start. It has some great information, lots of wonderful blogs and forums as well. Being asexual does not necessarily mean being aromantic (not wanting the emotional intimacy of a romantic but not necessarily sexual relationship. I know sexuals who are aromantic, and asexuals who are romantic (want the emotional intimacy of a partnership).
I will be happy to post bits and pieces as I go. I'm kind of hoping that maybe I can get it polished enough to submit for publication.
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Re: Probably TMI...
Date: 2013-01-17 02:13 am (UTC)It was only during my first year at law school, which was also my first year on dreamwidth, that I came across asexuality as an identity. Prior to that I had thought that I was "broken" in some fashion, or that I'd been celibate for so long that I was just used to it. When I found out I had Lyme, a disease that apparently attacks libido in addition to so many other things, I wondered if my lack of sexual drive was due to that. I've determined that it is okay either way. I can rarely recall ever feeling sexual attraction or the need for sex (speaking of TMI), and it usually required some deeper connection those few times I did feel it.
There are also quite a few misunderstandings about asexuality. I highly recomment The Asexuality Visibility and Education Network (AVEN) as a place to start. It has some great information, lots of wonderful blogs and forums as well. Being asexual does not necessarily mean being aromantic (not wanting the emotional intimacy of a romantic but not necessarily sexual relationship. I know sexuals who are aromantic, and asexuals who are romantic (want the emotional intimacy of a partnership).
I will be happy to post bits and pieces as I go. I'm kind of hoping that maybe I can get it polished enough to submit for publication.