So this is what the Dr. meant...
Aug. 30th, 2012 03:53 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
alee_grrlI wasn't too sure what to expect with the changeover to my newest antibiotics (a combo of hydroxichloriquine and clarithromiacin). He mentioned that different antibiotics affect the lyme in different ways. My understanding of what he said was that essentially the lyme spirochetes have adapted to different organs and systems and the different antibiotics target specific systems. The tetracycline type drugs (tetracycline and doxycycline) tackle the systems that cause the fatigue and pain. These antibiotics tackle the systems that cause mental and emotional issues (brain fog, depression, anxiety, etc). I am not a doctor and have little to no medical training. I also frequently suffer from brain fog and "OMG I'm at a doctor's office" anxiety. So my understanding may be way off base.
Regardless of how accurate my understanding of the treatment is, I was very wary of this new phase of treatment. I knew what herxheimer reactions were like for the other antibiotics (increased pain and fatigue and general ick feelings for the most part). I didn't know what to expect at all this go round, especially since I have been feeling pretty darn good for the past few weeks. I only had the vague expectation that it could make the "mental stuff" worse before it made it better.
So I started the new antibiotics last Friday. I'm to take half a pill of each which equals 250 mg clarithrimiacin and 100 mg of the hydroxichloriquine every other day after supper. So I took it on Friday, then again Sunday, and Tuesday. My next dose is tonight after supper. Generally the herx will happen within the first dose or two, and the differences between the days you take the antibiotics and the days you don't become very noticeable. I didn't notice much difference between the days Saturday through Tuesday. I felt decent. My energy levels were good and I had very little pain, stiffness and achiness. A little bit of dizziness here and there, which is usually just a good indication that I need to eat something cause my blood sugar is crashing. A little bit more forgetfullness and brain fog, but none of the depression or anxiety that I was expecting. Yesterday I felt really pretty good all day, and was on the ball and very engaged in my Intellectual Property class.
Today I woke up feeling off, but not in anyway that I could really put my finger on. I just didn't want to get out of bed and deal with the world. At all. Wasn't in pain, wasn't a lack of energy, wasn't even overwhelming sadness or anxiety. Just this emptiness and numbness...and oh yeah this is what depression feels like when it's unaccompanied by fatigue and pain. I'm just not used to it being all on its own. I did manage to get out of bed, eat breakfast and lunch, and go to class. Even managed to participate in class. Go me! But the entire time I felt weird and off. Not tired in the sense that I want to sleep and can't keep my eyes open, which is normally what I deal with, but lethargic. Unambitious? Uncaring? It is hard to find the right words for the feeling. It is that sense that the world is somewhere over there and I am not fully a part of it combined with the overarching realization that I am out of fucks to give with a little bit of brain fog and thinking through molasses thrown in for kicks. So I think I can safely say I now know what the Doc meant when he said that it will make the "mental stuff worse."
There is some good news though. I am aware of what my current mental state is and what is causing it. So I am a little better able to deal with it. Also, usually when I notice that I feel particularly bad on the day I am supposed to take the antibiotics, I notice the next day that I feel particularly good. This has always been the pattern before when I am on an alternating day schedule and should continue to be the pattern now. So tomorrow should quite literally be a better day. The frustrating news is that I have a social engagement that I am supposed to go to tonight. It is a kick-off bbq/gathering for the QUILTBAG group on campus, of which I am an executive board member. I have told everyone I will be there. I am not feeling like socializing at all. I also have a lot of reading to do for tomorrow's class and am having trouble concentrating. I will go to the bbq, because I really should. But I will leave early if need be. It will be fun I'm sure, I just have to find my ambition to go. There are other geeks and fen in the group, so I can always cover my current level of prickliness with conversation about the upcoming Dr. Who episode or discussions regarding the Avengers.
Now to tackle that International Law reading...
Regardless of how accurate my understanding of the treatment is, I was very wary of this new phase of treatment. I knew what herxheimer reactions were like for the other antibiotics (increased pain and fatigue and general ick feelings for the most part). I didn't know what to expect at all this go round, especially since I have been feeling pretty darn good for the past few weeks. I only had the vague expectation that it could make the "mental stuff" worse before it made it better.
So I started the new antibiotics last Friday. I'm to take half a pill of each which equals 250 mg clarithrimiacin and 100 mg of the hydroxichloriquine every other day after supper. So I took it on Friday, then again Sunday, and Tuesday. My next dose is tonight after supper. Generally the herx will happen within the first dose or two, and the differences between the days you take the antibiotics and the days you don't become very noticeable. I didn't notice much difference between the days Saturday through Tuesday. I felt decent. My energy levels were good and I had very little pain, stiffness and achiness. A little bit of dizziness here and there, which is usually just a good indication that I need to eat something cause my blood sugar is crashing. A little bit more forgetfullness and brain fog, but none of the depression or anxiety that I was expecting. Yesterday I felt really pretty good all day, and was on the ball and very engaged in my Intellectual Property class.
Today I woke up feeling off, but not in anyway that I could really put my finger on. I just didn't want to get out of bed and deal with the world. At all. Wasn't in pain, wasn't a lack of energy, wasn't even overwhelming sadness or anxiety. Just this emptiness and numbness...and oh yeah this is what depression feels like when it's unaccompanied by fatigue and pain. I'm just not used to it being all on its own. I did manage to get out of bed, eat breakfast and lunch, and go to class. Even managed to participate in class. Go me! But the entire time I felt weird and off. Not tired in the sense that I want to sleep and can't keep my eyes open, which is normally what I deal with, but lethargic. Unambitious? Uncaring? It is hard to find the right words for the feeling. It is that sense that the world is somewhere over there and I am not fully a part of it combined with the overarching realization that I am out of fucks to give with a little bit of brain fog and thinking through molasses thrown in for kicks. So I think I can safely say I now know what the Doc meant when he said that it will make the "mental stuff worse."
There is some good news though. I am aware of what my current mental state is and what is causing it. So I am a little better able to deal with it. Also, usually when I notice that I feel particularly bad on the day I am supposed to take the antibiotics, I notice the next day that I feel particularly good. This has always been the pattern before when I am on an alternating day schedule and should continue to be the pattern now. So tomorrow should quite literally be a better day. The frustrating news is that I have a social engagement that I am supposed to go to tonight. It is a kick-off bbq/gathering for the QUILTBAG group on campus, of which I am an executive board member. I have told everyone I will be there. I am not feeling like socializing at all. I also have a lot of reading to do for tomorrow's class and am having trouble concentrating. I will go to the bbq, because I really should. But I will leave early if need be. It will be fun I'm sure, I just have to find my ambition to go. There are other geeks and fen in the group, so I can always cover my current level of prickliness with conversation about the upcoming Dr. Who episode or discussions regarding the Avengers.
Now to tackle that International Law reading...
