alee_grrl: A kitty peeking out from between a stack of books and a cup of coffee. (Default)
So today was a very good day for two reasons. One, I met with a potential new therapist whom I really like that works with many trans and genderqueer folks. Said therapist is also well versed in dealing with childhood trauma and abuse. Normally she likes to do three visits for both patient and therapist to be sure that it is a good fit. I see her again on Tuesday. So that is of the good.

Two is that I met with a trans/genderqueer gynecologist today. I'm going to put the rest of this under a cut for those who are triggered by discussions of reproductive organs and issues )

So that was my busy but very happy making day. I'm going to chill for the rest of the day, and if I have the energy tomorrow I might do a bit of thrift store shopping. See if I can find some more masculine clothes to add to my wardrobe to see how it feels to let my more masculine side out to play.
alee_grrl: Eddie Izzard pointing at his head.  Text: In my Mind. (in my mind)
I know I've been super quiet the past few months. I stepped up my Lyme treatment, which meant a lot of time spent resting. I also needed some time to focus inward and to process several things. Now I feel like I'm ready to start socializing again, and ready to catch folks up on what has been going on in my head and life. This is likely to be a long post. It is also likely to contain some fairly heavy topics. Content Warnings: Discussions of Grief and loss, discussions of mental and physical health issues, mentions of body dysphoria/body image issues, gender dysphoria, gender identity issues, abuse and trauma )

For those who do not have the spoons (emotional or otherwise) to read the whole post, I've been doing a lot of thinking and come to the realization that I'm genderqueer. Not sure where on the spectrum I fall, but I am finally comfortable acknowledging that I am genderqueer. Reasons for not acknowledging it earlier are many and discussed in depth above. The big take away is that I am okay with the realization and taking steps forward in exploring a more authentic version of myself. It's just been a lot to process. But in the end I'm gonna be just fine. I'm currently comfortable with they/them and she/her pronouns. I'll let folks know if the preferred pronouns change.

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alee_grrl: A kitty peeking out from between a stack of books and a cup of coffee. (Default)
Manda

May 2017

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